Hi Parents, 

We just came through an awesome and slightly awkward week talking about Sex.  We feel it’s so important to partner with parents to address issues that dysfunctionally dominate youth culture.  As a youth ministry team we feel it’s so important to address these issues from a Jesus centered healthy perspective.  This week we are talking about what it means for us to have healthy view and relationship with the opposite sex honour God.

Intro – Where do you find healthy relationships on display in pop music and movies? When I listen to pop radio almost every song is about unhealthy sexual relationships or at the very least short term romantic relationships. When I watch movies almost every time you see a girl and a guy as lead actors there is a 90%  chance they are going to get together romantically and probably a 70% chance they are going to have sex at some point in the movie. Our culture has a very unhealthy view of the opposite sex, a view that is immersed in sexuality and objectification.

BIG IDEA: It’s important for us to learn to treat others as brothers and sister in Christ with honour and purity.

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1 Timothy 5:1 (NIV): “Treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity.” 

Proverbs 4:23-27(NIV):

23 Above all else, guard your heart,
 for everything you do flows from it.
24 Keep your mouth free of perversity;
 keep corrupt talk far from your lips.
25 Let your eyes look straight ahead;
 fix your gaze directly before you.
26 Give careful thought to the paths for your feet
 and be steadfast in all your ways.
27 Do not turn to the right or the left;
 keep your foot from evil.”

Definition of Purity: Freedom from adulteration or contamination; freedom from immorality.

 The Hebrew word for the heart is leb, also used figuratively for the feelings, the will, and even the intellect. The biblical view of the heart is not the intense intoxication of romantic passion as we view it today. Our feelings are only one-third of the package; the other parts are the will and the mind, which are usually far more objective. As much as our culture is currently concerned with how we feel about various things, God is more concerned with how our feelings should be governed by what we know to be truth about him.

Principles to having healthy opposite-sex friendships:

  1. Keep your relationships above reproach. Treat your friendships with absolute purity.
  2. Honour Christ above the friendship. Keep Jesus at the centre of your friendship.
  3.  Guard the heart—both your heart and your friend’s heart.

Questions around the dinner table:


  1.    When you think about the movies and music you take in how is the opposite sex portrayed through it?  
  2.    What are some of the challenges that are faced with keeping an opposite sex friendship healthy?
  3.    What advice is Timothy giving the church in the passage of scripture?  What does it mean to treat other people as brothers and sisters with absolute purity?
  4.    How does allowing God to govern our feelings, minds and actions change how we view and have relationships with the opposite sex?